Writing Update

I've discovered a new way to write. On the train.

In many ways its an old way to write. In a box, that sits under two other boxes in the study, are notebooks filled with writing done on the trains, years and years ago. But until a few weeks ago, writing my novel on the train wasn't something I thought to do.

Now I love it. I love it because it's otherwise bludging/reading MX time and so its not like the "I'm too busy" excuse can come out. And I love it because work has been a tad stressful of late and so having something fun and engaging to keep me occupied on the train when I could be stressing puts a really lovely spin on the working day.

But one of the best benefits is that on the train I spend more time writing than reading- and so I get allot of new stuff done.

When I sit down on the computer to write, inevitably I find myself reading over what I've already done. And fixing it up. And reading some more. And getting sucked into the story.

This might seem weird (as I wrote the thing), but just like I love re-reading old books, i actually enjoy the journey back into my world, and reliving the events again. In fact, I'm ashamed to admit it, but when I'm on the computer I read a great deal more than I write. It means keeps getting edited, which is good. It means that sometimes I get discouraged if I read a bit I don't like as much- which can sometimes lead to weeks on end where I think I can't write so I don't.

I'm getting better at fighting this discouragement. It's been helpful hearing that other writers feel this way. And I try to push myself to think "Okay, it's sounds bad, how can I make it better?" And the editing process starts me thinking again, "Maybe I can do this".

I remember the first time I really, really began to think I could do this.

When I first started my story, it was something of an amusement to Tim. All I told him was some names of the characters, and a few tiny aspects of the story- which was probably a bad idea as in hindsight most of the names were pretty bad, and most of the things I told him were pretty amusing in their infant stage.

So Tim would tease me whenever I would write. Not in a bad way, in a very funny way. But he definitely didn't take that seriously what I was doing, and quite frankly I wasn't taking it seriously myself.

One day I was working on my prologue. The prologue was the first thing I wrote when I felt like doing some fiction writing and so dusted off an old idea for a fantasy novel from a few years previous. It was the setting of the political and historical scene of the nation. And even after re-reading it over, and over again, I've made very few changes and I still think it's good.

One day I was reading it (again). Tim was in the study. Previously I hadn't let him read anything. He would be nice and supportive whatever he thought, but I would see right through him if he didn't like it. I was scared. But this day I decided I would actually read it to him.

So I read the Prologue.

Tim's response was to be quiet for a second. Then he said "You know, I think you could actually write this thing and get it published"

That was the moment that we both started taking my writing seriously.

That was the moment the dream began.
love B

Psalm 51:16-17

You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart,
O God, you will not despise.

What an amazing God we have, who deserved everything, who we have treated with such disdain.

Yet what sacrifice does he require? What do we need to present to him?

Only our broken and contrite hearts
He will not despise

Praise God!
love B

Adopting a 23 year old male

Last Monday Tim and I adopted a 23 year old male.

Of course- that's not really what happened. Our friend was moving to Sydney for work- and asked if he could stay with us until he found a place to live. But to me it feels like we've adopted him.

There are real pluses to adopting one at such a late stage in life. He has already been house trained- he is a firm believer in the concept that the one who cooks shouldn't be the one to do the dishes (which as a the family cook I greatly approve of), and every time i turn my back- another surface has been whiped down. He's also a firm believer in Christ- which is a great encouragement to Tim and I as we've been prividged to witness God's work in his life from a baby Christian when we met him- to one of the most enthusiastic Christians you will ever see.

It's will be a big adjustment for Tim and I. We are so used to it being just us- so little things like having to get properly dressed before leaving our room, and having to share a television are very foreign concepts! But it is exciting too. Tim preached recently on 1 Peter 4 (have I mentioned recently that my husband is the best preacher in the world) and we were both challenged by the call to "Offer hospitality without grumbling". And a few weeks later- that is what we are doing!

Please pray that we will "offer hospitality without grumbling", that our friend will find a spiritual and physical home up here soon, and that through it all Tim and I will still have the "quality time" we need together.

Oh, and did i mention "FOUR WEEKS UNTIL WE ARE DOWN IN MELBOURNE. YAY!"
love B

What ministry is like...

I was reflecting today on my first six months of working in my job and thinking about all the wonderful things i want to do in the next six months but don't have time for. It got me thinking.

Ministry involves having big dreams of doing wonderful, organised, professional programs and having deep, relevant and meaningful relationships with people that are peppered with good deeds and wonderful God-saturated conversations. Ministry involves watching those dreams be replaced with a crazy hard slog. You end up producing something that is no where near what you originally dreamed. And ministry involves watching a magnificent, powerful God in his grace and mercy using your disorganised, unprofessional programs and your not quite perfect relationships to do things that are greater than you ever imagined.

What a great reminder that the Christian life starts and continues and ends with grace!
love B

Dishes I like...

My holidays have taken on a food theme. I think- scary though this is (I'm actually turning into my very productive Mum, Dad and Sister)- I think I've grown out of my love of bulgy stay at home only watching TV holidays. I need something to do to structure my day. This holidays at least it's been cooking, reading cook books, planning meals. Yesterday the theme was healthy. Today I'm going for a Chinese menu- though I'm still planning on doing healthy dessert!

Anyway- I just opening up a file on my computer- and I was reminded of a funny Tim moment I thought I'd share. Sometimes I find it hard to know what to cook- and particularly to remember what things I've made that Tim has particularly enjoyed. So one day I started a word document which I titled "Dishes Tim likes"- and wrote down a few from the top of my head.

That evening- I opened word and was surprised to find in the "recently used documents"-above "Dishes Tim likes" was a document called "Dishes Bindy likes". I opened it and this was what I found:
· Plates
· Bowels
· Cutlery
· Pots
· Pans
· Glasses
· Mugs

I particularly like the mis-spelling of bowls

love B

Holidays

I'm on holidays.

It is the weirdest feeling.

I haven't actually been looking forward to these holidays that much. I was looking forward to kids club being over and theoretically having a break- but as Tim is today back at college it just seemed a waste of all the time in Lu I earned during the last crazy month. I'm not generally a hang at home by myself kind of person. I am a people person- and particularly a Tim person and it seemed such a frustrating shame that our only corresponding holiday was Monday!

But...despite that I think I will have a great week.

Kids club was just incredible. I don't know if I totally enjoyed it while I was there, I enjoyed part of it, but there is something about being the one keeping an eye on the time and making sure every things happening that means that you can't relax and enjoy the fun and excitement. One of the leaders (bless her!) who actually was really involved and helpful apologised to me because she didn't think she did much, she had too much fun to be working hard. That is definitely NOT how I feel, but I pray its how most of the leaders felt. But it was fun, it was a buzz, and it was a good reminder that God, despite my sometimes grumpy feeling that he doesn't, really does listen and answer my prayers

But I'm glad its over. This last term has just been huge. I think part of it has been realising that I have to stop thinking about myself as someone who works 4 days and therefore has lots of time. I don't. I don't have lots of time. Life is very full. Some of that fullness is due to the nature of my work. Some is due to wanting to be involved in College. Some is due to certain tasks (such as babysitting and cooking for people who need it) which I love and aren't technically work, but do take up my free time. Some is due to the fact that for health reason I need to keep up exercising- and as much as I enjoy that it does again take up time. And some is due to the simple act of keeping a house clean- even with Tim's assistance- it takes a while. And then there are just the life things that mean that sometimes even days off a written off with work, stress or just general sadness.

But now I can rest. Now i can sleep in and get up when I want to not when its time to do the next task. And now I can see how much of how I've been feeling is due to needing just this time.

It's a great feeling!!!!!
love B

Ready for a Holiday

I thought it was about time to do an update on my life.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

That's pretty much how I'm feeling at the moment. This time next week I will be well into the throngs of our Church's Kids Club- which I am coordinating- and during which i know I will have a fantastic time. Why do I feel so frazled? Not because I don't think it will be good. It's going to be wonderful. But because there is so much to get done this week when it comes to just my normal end of term week- that holiday club on top of that makes me want to bang my head against the table!

It's been a hard term.

I still love my job, and I still have many things happening that bring me great joy. But I'm so busy and so weary. And when I'm weary I am easily discouraged. And Melbourne just seems so far away at the moment! There is no trip down planned until September and no current prospect of visitors before then :(

Basically what it comes down to is I hit the point of needing a holiday about three or four weeks ago. And that said holiday is still not for another week and a bit.

And until then?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
love B
PS Prayer would be appreciated